That's right: for the environment this year, we decide to burden our systems with yet one more non-essential, fully air-conditioned, carbon-fuel-guzzling juggernaut. For the children, of course. Because there's things we want to tell them, and though this is the century of travelling without needing to physically relocate, especially for knowledge dissemination, our Science and Technology Dept. considers a Train (jeez, does that word evoke a coal-dusted, Dickensian era for anyone else?)the absolutely most environmentally friendly way to do it.
So of course, now when they argue again for the necessity of digging for coal in those last few 'no-go' areas of imaginary Indian forest reserves, there will be yet another reason clamouring for 'essential energy needs'. Happy Environment Day, children, and I hope you're paying attention.
Everytime I hear the word "greening" (used to evoke an image of blinding white teeth in dark brown faces, and wierd accents. Yeah, I know) I remember this story about a Sikh LI battalion somewhere in Assam that had a very demanding CO. Though the place, being Assam, was never particularly parched or anything, for some reason the grass in the place was always drying and brown. The CO took this as signs of laziness and neglect (you know how the army is about spit-polished, spanking shined appearances) and was always on their cases to do something about it.
Those poor dutiful (ex-peasant?) Sikh LI fellows diligently tried all they could think of, but no amount of vehement watering, weeding, turfing and love and attention seemed to have any effect. Things came to a head with the impending visit of a higher officer, and the COs ultimatum that he didn't care how, but by the time of the visit, a couple of days later, the grass had better be green or else.
Well, its not for nothing that Surds have their whole rep of doing the impossible (or is that the unthinkable), for lo and behold, the day of the visit dawned on the greenest grass that little valley had ever seen. The visit went very well, and everybody noticed and complimented the lovely green grass.
When it was all over, the CO called some of his fellows over, very well pleased with the success of the whole thing. "Well done, fellows, I knew you could do it if you put your minds to it," He boomed, "So how'd you manage it then?"
"Well, sir," one of the fellows snapped to attention, all puffed with pleasure, "like you said, it took some doing, but once we put our minds to it, it was only a matter of time. Though it was a bit of a close call, we weren't sure we'd be able to pull it off in time."
"What do you mean?" asked the officer.
"Well, first there was mixing just the right shade of green, and then we had to paint all of the grass in time for it to dry before the visit. Just thank the heavens it hasn't rained these last two days."
